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Posts Tagged ‘Adventures with Lady Di’

ADVENTURES WITH LADY DI: GIRL INTERRUPTED….UNSUCCESSFULLY

It’s come to my attention numerous times over the course of my life that apparently it can prove to be pretty difficult for people to interrupt me when I am in a conversation in a social setting.

I do tend to end up in what I can only imagine must appear to be very involved conversations all of the time.  I also tend to use my hands a lot when I speak, so I’m sure that adds to the intensity that the general observer who is not a party in the conversation supposedly witnesses.

This was all recently pointed out to me via an e-mail that an ex-coworker sent to me the day after an event (after party for an awards ceremony for a local publication that I attended with Lady Di) that he’d spotted me at, however in his words he “didn’t want to interrupt you [me] to say hello, as you [I] appeared to be in a serious conversation with the Director of New Media every time I [he] saw you [me].”

That is not the first time I’ve gotten that type of note/message from someone.   It’s happened many many times in the form of an email, a Facebook wall post (or back in the days of Myspace, via a comment), and/or sometimes a phone call, voicemail, or text message.  Next time someone sends me a message of that nature, I will direct them to this post.

In all fairness, I was in said conversation, however let me clarify that about half of the time these lengthy conversations ensue due to the fact that the person I am speaking with is probably either an old friend or someone who I haven’t seen in a long time, or both.   That was the case with this “Director of New Media,” whom Lady Di and I had met outside of a professional setting and our conversation wasn’t so much involving the hottest new social media platforms as it probably was discussing apartments and moving and other misc. things.

The other half of the time the conversation is probably with someone new that I’ve just met and am just getting to know, and as I do I do enjoy hearing about other people’s back stories sometimes it’s hard to stop someone in the middle of their life story, so I don’t.  Also, I am genuinely interested in what they are saying most of the time.   The only times I really walk away from conversations abruptly are if it goes from a normal conversation to one where they are blatantly hitting on me.   Another instance would be if I really feel that I should be circulating more (especially if I’m hosting the event), usually my exit strategy will be a less abrupt one as I’ll usually find someone else in the room who may share some common interests with the person I’d been in conversation with and pair them up to continue the conversation or embark on a new one.

However, please be assured that the conversation is probably not along the lines of discussing “sequencing of the human genome” nor any other area within molecular biology for that matter.  This is Los Angeles after all, and while I have encountered the stray “rocket scientist” in this town I can’t say it’s a common thing.  Thank goodness, as Science has never been my forte.  So, it’s safe to say that interrupting most of my conversations at any given time will not really prove detrimental to the human race.   If you’re successful in interrupting the conversation or at least having me notice you in my near vicinity, I will probably introduce you to whomever I am speaking with and more than likely incorporate you into the conversation.  I am not partial to one-on-one conversations as many of these long involved back and forths tend to be with a group at times.

Regardless, whether the conversation be with one or multiple people,  as with everything else I am definitely for the more tactful interruptions.  Recently, I had one of my good girl friends try to drag me away from a conversation I was in because she was more than a little intoxicated and decided she needed my attention then and there.  The person I was in a conversation with was someone I hadn’t seen in a long time and I was hesitant to walk away from it as I wasn’t sure that our group of friends would stick around long enough to allow me get to catch up that person later.  However, after her second attempt to pull me away it got a little embarrassing, and the person thankfully was of good humor and chuckling stated, “Wow, she really doesn’t want you to talk to me.”   I just apologized and at that point decided to cut the convo short.   This was definitely not one of the better ways to interrupt one of my conversations.  Interrupting a conversation in that manner should really be reserved for an emergency situation.

To see if I could figure out the best way to have a conversation interrupted or to capture the attention of the party in a conversation, I asked some of my friends what their methods of getting my attention were.

My two favorite answers were:

The one, who couldn’t really give me an answer, instead provided this “Interrupting Siria Contreras, the self-help book.  Hmmm…this is going to take some brainstorming [and possibly case studies]”

The second one was more on target and basically was a variation of what almost everyone else said, “I just charge right in. Of course I say, excuse me first, but I think for the most part you always look like you are deep in conversation. That’s your look and I know unless I say, excuse me, I’ll be waiting a long time.”

Geez, looking like I’m in deep conversation at all times is not necessarily one I want to sport at all times.  I think I laugh too much for it to be completely accurate, but vanity aside that approach is pretty on point.  Saying excuse me and then interrupting is perfect.  If you can’t bring yourself to do that you could also stand near me and I’ll probably notice you sooner rather than later (thank goodness for peripheral vision), that or you could bump into me as well I guess (people have been known to do this to me every now and then).

I could start to tell you the ways that I interrupt people in conversation, but this post would go on entirely too long if I did that.  The main thing to remember whether you’re interrupting me or someone else is to just take a minute to think about how you yourself would like to be interrupted.


BEHIND THE WHEEL: LESSONS LEARNED (PART IV OF IV)

In honor of the fact that my driver’s license is finally expiring after what seems like ages and since they didn’t just mail me a new one again like last time, I actually have to brave the DMV and a camera for a new photo (two of my least favorite activities) . Over the remainder of this week I’ll be sharing some of my adventures and lessons learned while behind the wheel. For Part I, which focuses on first car accidents and lessons learned, click here.  For Part II, which focuses on the anticipation and impatience associated with the time right before you legally obtain a driver’s license as a teenager, click here.  For Part III, in which you will learn that I have no sense of direction when it comes to driving, click here.

To wrap up this “Behind the Wheel” series, that has kept in line with the standard of over-sharing personal information that is the norm for this social-media ruled day in age, I’ll leave you with my lessons learned up until this point in my driving career.

LESSON #1:

Car Talks – The best (and sometimes worst) most honest conversations seem to happen in a car.  There’s something about the feeling of privacy that the enclave created within a vehicle leads one to lose their inhibitions and make confessions or declarations that we might not usually be able to so easily impart upon others, were we to be in any other location or setting.  Whether the car is in motion or at a standstill doesn’t so much matter; secrets are spilled, frustrations are released, and relationships are terminated (and/or sometimes salvaged)— all before either party exits the vehicle.  Some of the best conversations I’ve had with friends have been late night car chats lit only by the blinking hazard lights (flashing to warn the other vehicles that it may be a while before the car will be hitting the road again).  In fact, with some of my closer friends we sometimes make a habit of ending the night with a long car tête-à-tête.  Some of these conversations can be credited for re-storing sanity or keeping friends off the figurative “ledge,” while others are of a more light-hearted variety that usually result in a re-capping the night’s (or day’s) events.


LESSON #2:

Vehicle to Vehicle Flirting – I rarely pay attention to other people in surrounding cars while I’m driving.  Although I’m aware of what’s going on around me, I’m very often either working in my head or lost in thought.  If you want to get my attention while I’m driving you’re either going to have to yell my name and/or wave frantically, or do something outlandish and hope that I happen to glance in your direction to see it.  Just like every other girl who has ever been behind the wheel, I’ve been hit on by guys young and old at one point or another while in my car.  The worst is when you are stuck at a light and all you can do is roll up your window and/or turn up your music, and yet they still persist. I’ve even been serenaded a few times by someone in a neighboring car.  Those that know me know I really don’t like being hit on and will usually ignore it. I always wonder if that ever works on any girls?  I don’t think any of my friends have ever made a love connection from one car to another at a stoplight/sign or while driving.  If you have I’d like to hear about it.

Anyhow, the lesson I learned came in the form of a beautiful sunshine-y day in Long Beach, Ca. I was in college and as usual had a car full of my girl friends with me.  We were heading back to campus, when one of them told us that the guy in the car next to us had been staring into the car for a while.  We all turned to check him out and he was actually kind of cute.  However, being about 19 and 20 year olds we decided it might be fun to mess with him and decided to all give him our sexiest glances.  We weren’t ever those girls, but for some reason we all went with it.  I think we were more silly than sexy (I really don’t think I even know how to be sexy), however because I was the driver he was concentrating on me, so I kept it up just to mess with him. I figured that after the light changed, I could speed up and be done with that and never see that guy again.  The light changed and we entered into the Long Beach traffic circle.  Now for those of you familiar with that traffic circle you probably know that it can seem a little intimidating the first few times you are in it, but after a while you get used to it.  However, it’s still an area where you have to pay attention to the vehicles around you.  Long story short, the poor guy ended up rear-ending the car in front of him because he tried to maintain eye contact with me while driving.  I saw the whole thing and felt horrible.  We all did.  I wanted to go back and apologize, but we all figured that might make it worse and he’d had the choice to look away.  I still feel awful and guilty anytime I think of that story.  I hope the damage wasn’t major (it didn’t appear to be), I also hope that that incident taught that guy to keep a better eye on the road.

So although it’s not something I’d do anyway I will never ever flirt in a vehicle ever again.  It doesn’t lead to anything good based on my own past experiences.

LESSON #3:

Chivalry – While this could refer to opening of car doors, etc. (which is in some cases alive and well), I’ll stick to providing some examples that revolve around car troubles.   Be it the fact that I’m a female, or perhaps the fact that you will almost always find me in dresses and heels, or maybe I just look like I really need help in these type of situations? I can’t say that I’ve ever had car troubles without having people around who were willing to help, whether I needed their assistance or not.   Yes, they are primarily male, but that’s who seems be better acquainted with the automobile.  I’ve pretty much always had roadside assistance plans for all of my vehicles, so although I’m usually covered when it comes to qualified help with car troubles – we all know how long that can take at times to arrive, so the generous act of a willing-to-help-passerby is sometimes immensely appreciated and welcome.

Here are three examples where I encountered an abundance of this willingness to assist.

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Example #1Cracked Transmission:  While I was still in college, I ended up cracking the transmission in my car while backing out of a driveway late one night.  I fell off the curb, and hit the pavement pretty hard.  All of us in the car figured I’d done some sort of damage, but none of us were sure what it was.  The next day when I went to drive it, it was fine initially– but the longer I drove it, it began to get a little jerky.  I had no idea what it was, so of course I called my dad (either he or my brother usually end up being my first phone call when it comes to car issues out of habit, even before boyfriends) to tell him what the car was doing and what had happened.  He was in a different city so there wasn’t too much he could do other than tell me to take it to a mechanic and not take it to the dealer so that we wouldn’t get ripped off.   So, in the meantime at school word had spread that I was having car issues and some of our guy friends and other guys I didn’t really know made an attempt at trying to diagnose the issue.  I don’t know how familiar any of them were with car repair (they were quite the eclectic mix of creative types, surfers, regular college guys, etc.) , but I did appreciate the fact that they were trying to help.  A couple of them did accurately say that it was the transmission that seemed to have a leak.  I ended up taking it to Pep Boys which was down the street and having them diagnose it and sure enough it was the transmission.  I ended up having to learn how to properly put in transmission fluid to keep replenishing the fluid that had been lost until the issue had been resolved.  It was highly entertaining to have my guy friends trying to give me crash courses on common car problems and how to solve them during this whole experience, and this was obviously one instance when I really appreciated their efforts even if they really weren’t sure of what they were doing.

Example #2 - First Flat Tire:  I think I’ve only had one real flat tire incident in my life (knock on wood) and I recall it vividly.  I was driving on the freeway and all of a sudden, the road started feeling a little bumpy.  My thought at the time was somewhat insolent and along the lines of, “Geez, they seriously need to re-pave this lane.”  Then it got worse and all of a sudden I saw a stream of what looked like smoke trailing my car, and I realized my car was the one with the problem not the road.  So, I had to maneuver my way from the fast lane to the shoulder of the road.   I proceeded to call my dad and let him know what happened so he instructed me to get out of my car since I was next to the freeway, he didn’t want me to be in the car if anyone hit it and to call my roadside assistance. On that day we happened to be in the same town, so he said he’d head there as well.

I did as he said, getting out and proceeding to step to the other side of my car to a safer area to call roadside assistance.  No sooner had I dialed the number when I turned around to see that 2 cars had already pulled over to see if I was ok.  One was a car with three guys about my age  (the driver thought he knew me and it turned out we did have friends in common as some of them rode motocross bikes together, but I didn’t know them), the second car belonged to a middle-aged gentleman.

They all volunteered to stay with me until roadside assistance arrived, as unfortunately none of them could safely change the tire as the flat was on the driver’s side and that was dangerously close to the freeway.  So, wait with me they did.

A police officer pulled up to determine what the issue was, after this a series of events worthy of inclusion in a “Three Stooges” episode ensued.  First, as the policeman approached us he ended up falling in a gopher hole and we all tried our hardest to hold back our laughter as he attempted to regain his composure and re-establish his sense of authority.  As I was explaining that it was just a flat, and that I was waiting for roadside assistance to arrive a second policeman arrived, thinking maybe his buddy needed back-up.

Thankfully, the roadside assistance arrived finally followed immediately by my dad.  Everyone else started to leave, since they weren’t really needed.

I can still remember the concerned expression that my father wore on his face as he approached me and my car.   (more…)


Good-bye Summer…Hi Fall, How are you?

Now that Summer is officially over and done with (and to clarify we mean the season, not Eric) and Fall is upon us we have decided to take a look back at our summer (the good, the bad, and the ugly) and have asked some friends to do the same. We will see September off with some End of Summer interviews over the course of the next couple of weeks.

Kicking that series of interviews off is our Q&A with local band Robotanists. We first came across Robotanists in early 2008 and quickly became fans of their music and asked them to participate in our Childhood Observed: Toys for Tots Benefit (alongside Automatique, Automatic Music Explosion, Beatmo, Maggie Malyn, Voices Voices, The White and the Writing, and You Me and Iowa)  that has yet to reach fruition but you can watch a teaser video of here. They spent a day with TRAffIK photographer Jessy Plume and video producer Byron Turk at the LA Zoo getting kicked off of Merry-go-Rounds and being embraced by the Pinwheel Palace. Check out their feature here.

Speaking of Jessy and Byron…

Jessy

Our “PhotographistJessy Plume managed to remain cooler than most of us will ever be, while managing to juggle a multitude of projects.  We’ll soon be collaborating to bring you some more fun photos.  Who knows what our Creative Pow-Wows will bring you.  In the meantime please enjoy her photography of bands that participated in our Childhood Observed themed photo shoots that we’ll be bringing you in next couple of weeks. Also her photo of L.A. band Voices Voices for this same project is currently included in the latest issue of Filter Magazine.

        

Voices Voices by Jessy Plume 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Byron in Louisiana

Byron is currently in the swamp lands of Louisiana bonding with the ‘gators and all of the other inhabitants of these murky waters working on a top secret film project. The new season of his show Storm Chasers will air on Discovery Channel Oct.18. In the meantime you can read about their storm chasing adventures here.

 

 

Brandy and Heather

I’ll bring you some of my Summer Adventures w/ Lady Di very soon.   Maybe we can even convince Brandy (“BB” – pictured left with TRAffIK Stopper Heather Ellis) to share some of her own.  We’ve got a lot of great fashion and style content as well as features lined up for you in coming weeks including one on Super-girl Espree Devora.  

Last of all in the coming months you will see a few changes hit the TRAffIK site. We’ll be adding some fantastic new writers, new columns, and we have also been working on making the site a little easier to navigate.  Stay tuned.

We hope you all had a great adventurous season of fun in the sun.

xoxo

Siria and the TRAffIK Team


An ‘Unlit’ Saturday

 

all photos by Andrea Carroll courtesy of Robotanists

Unlit 1 by Andrea CarrollUnlit was a somewhat exclusive traveling night time house party started by British singer/songwriter Jont that I was lucky enough to attend a couple of times back in 2005 when I’d first moved to LA, before it’s lengthy hiatus set in. Since the parties featured live acoustic musical performances, I would imagine that it was thought best to keep the guest list to a minimum and therefore only invite core supporters of the movement to ensure that they wouldn’t be shut down. These parties have taken place not only here in the states, but also regularly occur in London, England where Jont spends much of his time.

Last Saturday Lady Di and I went to a daytime installment of Unlit.

When I got the invite, I was glad to see it coming back and even though I had been under the weather I knew I had to make it. Most of you know I am a strong supporter of creators in any of the arts collaborating with their peers and building their own communities that offer support to each other. Communities of this sort serve as incubators to great talent and sadly there are never enough of them.

The return took place poolside at the home of Tony Berg in Brentwood, who graciously lent his home to the event. People sat around the pool drinking, mingling, playing catch up, and enjoying the special acoustic performances as well as dj-ing by friend Jon Hershfield (www.isgoodmusic.com. Jon credits the original Unlit parties as being “where he learned to dj from the closet of Jont’s apartment.

Unlit Jon H by Andrea Carroll

Unlit 2 by Andrea Carroll

Unlit poolside 2 by Andrea Carroll

 

(click on images to enlarge)

 

 

 

Jont and Jon Hershfield alternated mcing/hosting duties saying a few kind words about each artist (which included Jont, Robotanists, Marvelous Toy, and Jay Matsueda, among many other guest appearances) prior to their performances.

Unlit Robotanists by Andrea Carroll

The great thing about shows like Unlit, where the artists are forced to perform completely stripped down versions of their songs, is that true talent is easily identified. It is always great to see bands like our old friends in the Robotanists translate over well acoustically (which is not always the case with bands that have such a full live musical sound when plugged in). However, Lead singer Sarah Ellquist had no problem projecting her voice to the audience.

This was Lady Di’s first Unlit, and I think she came away with the same appreciation for it as I had after the first time I’d attended one almost 4 years ago.

Cheers to many more Unlits!

Bloomfest 1Bloomfest 2Robotanists will be performing Saturday at BLOOMFEST  (716 Traction Avenue, LA 90013 ), which will feature 14-Live Bands, Art , Films, Beer,  Etc. FREE ADMISSION


ADVENTURES WITH LADY DI: Proper Hugging Etiquette

This past weekend, I dragged Amanda Jones and Lady Di with me to the going away dinner for one of my former co-workers. I was sad to see him go, but happy for him and his new opportunity at the same time. As we were all parting ways the topic of hello/good-bye greeting rituals in other countries came up. A kiss on each cheek for Quebec, Spain, Portugal, or Mexico (among other countries I’m sure) and one extra kiss for a total of three air/cheek kisses from the Swiss, French, and I believe Italians (feel free to correct me if I’m wrong, I don’t feel like looking it up). I have experienced most of these customary cheek and air kiss greetings since I was little. We laughingly discussed those that we’ve sometimes encountered that will skip the cheek and try to kiss you on the lips catching you completely off guard. Most of the time you just laugh it off and escape politely as quickly as possible.

Funny enough, Lady Di and I were just trying to explain how lengthy of a process saying hello and good-bye can be just a few days prior to two of our new guy friends Jamie (native Irishman) and Robert (a native Brit) when we go out. Our expansive circle of friends seems to have adopted the hug as our official hello and goodbye greeting. For the most part, the hugging stays manageable, but with one particular group of friends that we have in common it can be endless. The problem (although it’s a welcome issue) is that we all know each other, and there are certain events that can bring us all together…it is then that a few hugs can turn into literally hundreds. I’m not sure how it began, but we all do it and most new people generally take to it very quickly as well.

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